Shehecheyanu Moments
One of my favorite blessings is the shehecheyanu. It’s a short little thing that thanks God (if God is your thing) for bringing you to a new experience. If God is not your thing I think you can still appreciate the shehecheyanu because it’s just taking a moment out and acknowledging that something new and wonderful has happened. Actually beyond that it’s acknowledging that being alive and getting a new experience (no matter how small or large) is wonderful.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, Ruler of the universe, who has granted us
life, sustained us, and enabled us to reach this occasion.
As you know I’ve been having a hard time lately. I’m a bit better now and I’m trying to really integrate the feeling behind the shehecheyanu into my daily life. If I look for it there is at least something everyday that is new and wonderful and makes my life worth living. It was so, so hard for me to see that for a while. I’m trying really hard to do it now and hope I don’t stop doing it again in the future.
So, a couple shehecheyanu moments of late (a couple “official ones” and a couple not so much with the official):
- I attended a weekday morning minyan for the first time today. I’m in shul all the time for shabbat services and holidays and have attended a weekday evening minyan but never a 7:15AM one. We have people who have committed to attending weekday services so that we always have a minyan and there is a phone tree of people to call just in case we’re short but this week several people are on vacation so rabbi specifically asked for volunteers to add to the minyan count this week. He was kind of giddy to see me there early this morning and was like “is this your first morning minyan?” When I nodded affirmative he was like “Shehecheyanu!” When services were ending he said “Wait! It was Michelle’s first morning minyan we all have to say shehecheyanu with her!.”
- Yesterday I went shopping for a tallit. It was a bit of an experience both because the gift shop women were hysterically funny but also because this is a big step observance wise and tradition wise. It was a little bit of an intimidating experience. I have a lot of thoughts on the specific tallit I bought and why, so much so that if I write about those reasons they’ll need their own post. When my tallit gets here (naturally it had to be special ordered) I’ll get to say the shehecheyanu the first time I put it on.
- Last night on my back patio was so very perfect. I literally said out loud “My God this is perfect” and I meant it. That moment was so beautiful and the air felt so good on my skin and the book I was reading had me captivated. I didn’t say the shehecheyanu then but that feeling of being grateful for that moment was with me.
- I finished a book the other day. During my breakdown I could not read. I hadn’t finished a book in nearly a month. One of the scariest parts of my mental state to those who know me well was the fact that I couldn’t read. It screamed “gigantic red flag” to them. It was a very big accomplishment to finally be able to read again. And now I’m back to my normal pattern of reading three books at one time (one religious, one fiction, one non-fiction).
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